MANY men complain that after their children are born, the relationship dies because the wife turns her attention to the kids and leaves the man wanting. Many women are guilty - they often don't know how to juggle the needs of children and a husband. The couples who succeed have helped us with these 10 ways to sustain a relationship after childbirth.
1. Regain your attraction.
Believe it or not, men are moved by attraction, so the moment you start losing your attractiveness will be the moment he starts looking elsewhere. To avoid this pitfall, ensure that you exercise to get rid of the excess baby fat, tone your body and stay fit in the process. Exercise will get rid of some of the fatigue that you are sure to feel.
2. Set aside time for your spouse.
No matter how tedious looking after the baby is, never neglect the needs of your spouse - they can be as jealous as a two-year-old! Ensure that you spend time with him letting him know that he is just as important to you as he was before the baby came. When the child is asleep, make some adult time and spend this time together just cuddling up to each other. This is also a good time to spend bonding - you can talk, watch TV, tend to our hobbies, have sex, etc. Whatever you want to do, know that the time is literally for the both of you.
3. Change your wardrobe.
One sure way of being attractive to your spouse is to change your wardrobe and ensure that you get rid of the baggy maternity clothes you wore during pregnancy. This is also a good time to get back into your short shorts since he missed seeing you in them for so long.
4. Go out on dates.
Leave the child in the care of a trusted relative for a day out of the week or fortnight and go out together. This time is very important for bonding. Alternate if you desire - one week visit somewhere he enjoys then the next time around go someplace you enjoy. Talk about topics unrelated to the baby.
5. Do things together.
Encourage him to play an equal role in the child's life. Giving baths, changing diapers and even feeding is a form of bonding not just with the child but with each other. As he gets closer to the baby, he will also feel closer to you.
6. Do vaginal exercises.
To keep your love life burning, try the Kegel exercise which will tighten the walls of the vagina thus allowing you both to enjoy intercourse as mush as you did before childbirth. Kegel exercises consist of contracting and relaxing the muscles which form part of the pelvic floor. This results in the strengthening of the muscles of the vagina making the vagina becoming tighter over time.
7. Physical contact.
Physical contact and all that good stuff, even in front of the child(ren) in a relationship is important in keeping the intimacy alive. Kiss a lot, hug as soon as you get a chance to and sit in his lap while you find out how his day went. This adds volume to your relationship.
8. Plan ahead.
Acknowledge and appreciate all the wonderful things you'll do for each other, inspite of the fact that a child is in the picture. Acknowledge what your partner does and make suggestions as to how it could be better.
9. Be confident in yourself.
Some women may see a change in their body as a result of the new baby. Love your body for what it is and in doing so, your spouse will appreciate you as you are. Confidence goes a long way!
10. Rekindle your interest in lovemaking.
Keep the flames and passion alive by finding interesting ways of making love (this doesn't necessarily have to include intercourse), as long as it is spontaneous and can achieve the desired results.
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